My mother is coming to Hong Kong at the end of this week specifically to attend her friend's funeral. They had known each other for some 40 odd years. I can't imagine what it's like to lose someone you've known for that long, but I do know that as one gets one older, death becomes a more frequent visitor.

Lately, I've started to get the sense that I'm on the clock. Under pressure to make some kind of decision.  Perhaps I've enjoyed my freedom and carefree life for too long. Wait, is that possible?  Free from responsibilities is not the same as being irresponsible. I am the most responsible person I know. Seriously. Maybe that's why I am loathe to take on responsibilities. By the same vein, free from commitments is not the same as being fearful of commitments. It could just be that I take commitment so seriously that I would not enter into one without being fully aware of all its ramifications. Reading and understanding the fine print, so to speak. And there is always pages and pages of fine print, and hidden terms and conditions.

I went out and took pictures for the first time in about two months. I had ordered some Polaroid Artistic Z film from Pola Premium and shot with them for the first time, but the pictures were way under-exposed. I'm not sure if there is something wrong with the camera's meter, or if the film has already gone bad, even though the expiration date is September this year. Normally, Polaroid film can stay relatively fresh at least six months beyond expiration.  I hope it's not the film.  I have other cameras I can use, but if the film is bad, it's bad.

The day before I left for Tokyo, I checked the weather and it was supposed to be sunny and cool.  Then a typhoon that was hovering over Manila decided to follow me up north, and it rained in Tokyo all the while I was there. Don't get me wrong, I like rain just fine. But if I had known I wouldn't have brought so much film. As it turned out, I spent most of my time indoors, and had no use for the film I brought.

I'm taking a midnight flight to Tokyo and will be back on Monday night. No particular reason needed to go to my favorite city. Just wanted to get away for a few days. (My mom doesn't know about this little getaway, so please, not a peep.) This is a much welcomed reprieve, especially after what happened last week. I am still assessing what transpired, and what it means going forward.

I leave you with a picture of the British museum.

Karena Lam is one of my favorite actresses. Recently, she published a book - the term book is defined loosely here - it is more like a large sealed envelope that contains some of her Polaroid pictures, posters and drawings, hand-written notes, and a music CD.  It is all a tribute to the Italian architect Le Corbusier. The contents of each are different because each is hand-made, and only 200 are available. I got my grubby hands on one yesterday, but I'm not sure I want to open it.  Apparently Karena is also a fan of instant photography, and she uses an SX-70.

Here are some of my Polaroids from the trip. In the past, I have always posted Polaroid pictures in more or less their original size and intact with their signature white border, but lately, perhaps influenced by Wendy Bevan and her fashion photography work on Polaroid, I have gained new appreciation for the film's unique texture which becomes a prominent feature of the medium, rather than just a by-product, when shown many times enlarged.

Now I am going back and re-scanning all my photographs in 800dpi, or about 2400 x 2400.  Scanning pictures has never been one of my favorite activities, because it's very tedious and time-consuming. But the results can be quite eye-opening.